They’ve been lying in the back of the cupboard since you bought them. They made you feel so young- they made you feel like spring had sprung.

But you never made it to (let alone through) the Glastonbury ticket scrum and the line-ups at Leeds and Reading this weekend didn’t make much sense.

But there’s always Carfest, which is altogether nicer. It’s in posh Hampshire for a start, and it’s on a farm so you can test your recently acquired cooking skills decorating biscuits and making ice cream – and Father can learn how to flip burgers to professional standards.

And then there are the kids- Sharky and George, those ex-Etonian reprobrates will entertain them all afternoon with water-bombs fired high into the damp air from catapaults.

In short, if you are white, from the Home Counties and have 1.8 children in private education, Carfest is for you.

Music – (it ain’t what I call rock ‘n’ roll)

We didn’t stay for Paloma, put off by her sneering earlier in the summer about Mums and Dads in the audience. WTF was she doing here then?

It was a Chris Evans love in and it rained enough for us to feel the wellies were a worthwhile purchase.

For some reason we found ourselves in front of the stage so if you are a fan of Dan Gillespie Sells, and what right thinking man isn’t, here are some pin-ups.

For Stella , it was all about the Smiley Car

And for me it was about the Camaro

I met her on the strip three years ago

In a Camaro with this dude from L.A.

I blew that Camaro off my back and drove that little girl away

Seasick Steve was great and so were Paul Heaton and Jacqui Abbott

Stella and I were able to demonstrate some Legal and General/First Actuarial solidarity

This is the car that Ayrton Senna drove in his first season (so nearly winning Monaco in the rain) – Tolman 1984

And this is the car that Jody Scheckter won the Formula 1 championship in in 1978

And here’s a racing Outspan orange and a racing sofa

And Chris Evans’ Mum was guest of honour

And I shed a little tear because I must be getting old to like this stuff. And…….

‘Cause summer’s gone and the time is right

For racing in the street’

Tonight my baby and me we’re gonna ride to the sea

And wash these sins off our hands

Rock and Roll was always a lie, Springsteen was the guy who made me see that.