Deck the halls with bells and Holly!
Fancy a Carol this Christmas?
Holly and Carol have a particularly hard time at this time . They are decked and sung and the butt of too many gags.
All the best jobs go to us guys- Rudolf (red nosed) , Santa (kissing Mummy) not to mention assorted elves, shepherds and wise men.
The institutional sexism of Christmas goes unchallenged. Mother Claus is left basting the turkey , as back-room as Mary in her crib.
Attempts to replace Christ with the X-factor (as in Xmas) are unnecessary, for all the plangent homilies on “thought for the day” advent is a glide-path to the debauchery of the Christmas break.
Let’s face it , we see Christmas as an opportunity for the Lords of misrule to reassert the ancient barbaric sexist tradition of the office party, the 24 hour mega-binge of Christmas day and the extended hangover that culminates in the mother of all piss-ups- New Years.
Christmas is what we do after a year behaving ourselves. But can we please move on! I want a merry Christmas but I don’t do Dickens!
I do the Santa Brand Book
And when I say that the Pension Play Pen is having its Christmas Party tonight in the Counting House from 6pm (usual Gallery room at the back)….
I mean that I will be standing at the bar, buying anyone a drink who cares to turn up. And we will drink and sing and flirt and do those stupid things we don’t do in the other 11 months (well not much).
And we won’t regress into some Victorian parlour!
We do these things because that’s what Christmas is about. I don’t care about the religious framework, I don’t care about the other 11 months of well-measured and well-governed respectability. I want my Christmas to be a riot!
And I want to give it back to the women. I don’t hold with this nonsense that sees the assertion of Victorian values (e.g . women do the work, men get all the fun). I want Carol and Holly putting sticking it to us grinches.
So my pre-Christmas resolution is to have fun, share fun and make it fun for the gals! I’m going to start wrapping my own presents, topping and tailing my own sprouts and I’m going to make damned sure that the women in my life get as much of a holiday as I do.
The Pension Play Pen party will toast the the women (and the men) who have made 2014 so great.
So if you are in the City tonight, before you go home, make your way to Bank, and let’s have a knees up!